Like our weaknesses, we can determine the relationship red flags we might have according to our signs and the elements that rule over us.
There is a lot of things the zodiac signs can tell us about ourselves. More often than not, we see what we want to see in our zodiac signs, and horoscopes are usually kept just vague enough to allow us to apply them to our particular situation. When love and relationships are involved, though, sometimes it helps to get a little guidance from the stars and figure out what mistakes we might be making, in order to prevent them from sabotaging our relationships over and over again.
Like our weaknesses, we can determine the relationship red flags we might have according to our signs and the elements that rule over us. In fact, most of them actually overlap! While someone might be able to identify our red flags based on our sign, that doesn’t mean that it has to determine the course of all of our future relationships. Instead of looking at the following entries as things that hinder your love life, look at them as helpful suggestions of what not to do! While these red flags might be difficult to overcome – especially in a relationship, where you’re already inclined to feel at your most vulnerable – it is important to see how you can shift away from them, turning your red flag into a green light!
Fire (Aries, Leo, Sagittarius): Tend To Have Selfish Tendencies
Fire signs are exactly what their element would suggest: Fiery. These signs have a take-no-prisoners approach when it comes to love, and they will do whatever it takes to get what they want. While they often see it as being uncompromising about their standards, Fire signs need to understand that sometimes, relationships require things like negotiation and compromise to truly work. Instead, these three see such things as a sign of weakness and simply won’t stand for it.
No one wants to be in a relationship with someone who is focused only on themselves and their own needs and, unfortunately, that is the biggest flaw for Aries, Leo, and Sagittarius.
These three signs think of themselves as number one at all times, and, while that can be a good mindset to have in certain situations, in a relationship that requires an equal partnership to work, it usually spells disaster.
Selfishness can take on many forms, but when it comes to relationships, Fire signs will always believe that it’s their way or the highway and, if you care about them enough, you will always choose the former, or risk losing them forever. When the stakes are that high, it’s hard not to see the red flags everywhere.
Aries: You Let Your Arrogant Side Out A Tad Too Often
There are a lot of things to love about the Aries girl: You’re passionate, independent, and confident – three things that make you incredibly attractive to your partner. However, what makes you a dream to date can also make you an absolute nightmare when it comes to relationships. While your impulsiveness and spontaneity mean that you’re a lot of fun to be around, you also tend to put yourself on a pedestal and force your partners to try to measure up.
Arrogance is one of your worst traits, Aries girl, and the thing that raises a red flag for the person who’s looking to get to know you better. Confidence is one thing but, all too often you tip the scales into cocky territory. While your self-assured nature has you owning whatever room you walk into, it can border on narcissism. Your refusal to see or acknowledge your flaws make it difficult to maintain a romantic relationship with you, because you think everything you do is amazing, without exception. You have plenty to offer, Aries, but a little humility every now and then wouldn’t hurt! Taking a moment to acknowledge your shortcomings is important for a balanced relationship, Aries girl.
Leo: All About That Drama
Every Leo lady knows that she craves the spotlight. Having all eyes on you is one of the biggest highs you can imagine, and so you often seek out relationships or situations that will put you in the center of everyone’s attention.
Unfortunately for whoever is trying to woo you, though, that thirst for the spotlight often translates into an appetite for drama! You see, Leo girl, you don’t differentiate between good attention and bad attention, as long as you get it. You need drama in a relationship in order to feel loved, appreciated, and passionate. Anything resembling stability or balance can feel boring and stagnant to you.
In fact, you probably have a long list of ex-lovers and relationships that didn’t fizzle out but blew up instead.
Your penchant for the drama raises red flags for a lot of guys, because who wants to be around someone who is willing to stir the pot just because? What seems like fun to you can actually cause a lot of destruction, but, since you’re getting what you want out of it, you don’t pay it much mind. Understanding that a relationship can have lulls and still be solid is necessary if you ever want to get out of this phase of catastrophic relationships.
Sagittarius: Terrified Of Commitment
If you’re casually dating a Sagittarius girl, you’re probably having a lot of fun! She’s open-minded, free-spirited, and always up for an adventure! However, if you’re hoping to have something a little deeper with a Sag girl, you’d better watch out, because these ladies almost always have one foot out the door, just in case.
Fear of commitment is the biggest red flag for women born under the sign of Sagittarius. They hate the idea of settling, which can be a good thing, but also means that they’ve usually bailed whenever things start looking tough or too serious for their liking. The things is, the Sagittarius woman wants to experience everything the world has to offer and, in her mind, that’s impossible to do properly if she has someone else tagging along. Rather than look at a potential partner as a possible teammate, she sees them instead as a roadblock to her eventual happiness.
Flying solo is just what this sign prefers to do, which can prove to be a major hindrance when it comes to serious relationships. If you’re just looking for a good time, this is your girl, but if you’re planning for the future, you’d better be aware that this girl runs at the sight of commitment.
Earth Signs (Taurus, Virgo, Capricorn): May Have A Pretensious Side
Earth signs are often sturdy in their decisions and views when it comes to their wants, needs, goals, and values. This can translate into having a great sense of self, but it can also mean that these signs operate best on their own, since they can torch the relationships they’re in because of their impossibly high standards and inability to please them.
Earth signs are usually quite refined and cultured, with an appreciation for the best that the world has to offer, so why would they settle for anything less?
It’s awesome that they’re so educated, but it can mean that they reek of pretension. You might think that you’ve found a great restaurant, but an Earth sign will tell you why it’s not so hot, and then suggest a better one. You might have found a gorgeous pair of shoes, but leave it to an Earth sign to inform you that the quality if sub-part and that you definitely overpaid.
The snobbishness of the Earth sign is usually matched by their drive and determination, which could make them a great employee, but not an awesome partner. Earth signs certainly have a lot to offer in the love department, but it’ll take some time to get past their pretentiousness to see it!
Taurus: Tends To Be Stubborn
One of the Taurus woman’s best qualities can also be one of her worst. While you, Taurus girl, are stubborn in that you know what you like, and so can be an easy person to by for and to please, you can also be stubborn in the sense that, when someone gets caught in an argument with you, there’s no chance of you ever backing down.
Like the bull that represents this sign, you are very set in your ways. What’s worked for you has been working so far so, you figure, why mess with a good thing? However, when a new person enters your life, you want them to mold themselves to your specifications and preferences while offering no leeway on your own end. Like we said, you’ve been working well so far, it’s this OTHER person who’s thrown a wrench into things!
Relationships are about two people coming together and fitting together, though, not one person fixing themselves to match you. Your stubborn personality might seem adorable in certain scenarios, but having to deal with the temper that accompanies it can make your partner feel like their needs don’t matter – a red flag if we ever saw one!
Virgo: Nothing Is Good Enough
Everyone who has ever met a Virgo woman knows that they are too hard on themselves. Virgo girl, you hold yourself up to impossibly high standards and then chastise yourself if you fail to meet them. Most of the time, this tendency to be hyper-critical and perfectionistic can result in a successful career and education, but it doesn’t work out so well for you when it comes to your love life. You see, Virgo woman, your critical side doesn’t stop with you.
In order to steel yourself against the possibility of things going awry, you prepare yourself for the worst, and that means picking at every little thing your partner does, in case it ends up causing more problems down the road.
Look, we’re all for communicating your issues and annoyances with your SO, but you are, well, less than tactful when you do it. Your relationship red flag is that you are too critical of everything, to the point where you seem impossible to please and reject potential suitors based on some arbitrary list.
That negativity is just too much to deal with, and any possible lovers might just walk on by. Cutting yourself – and everyone else – some slack is necessary if you want to actually enjoy yourself!
Capricorn: Push Comes To Shove
The Capricorn woman is a mysterious creature. You are someone who is passionate about her work, ambitious about her life’s goals, and incredibly intelligent, but you can also seem cold and unfeeling, especially to those who don’t know you well. We know that you have a bit of a squishy center – once someone has earned the right to see it – but, as far as romantic first impressions go, you are aloof and icy as hell!
When dudes are looking for a woman to date, they don’t often list “pushiness” as a must-have quality, which is what makes for the Capricorn girl’s relationship red flag. You know what you want and how to get it, Cap girl, but you operate on a schedule that has no room for error or flexibility. Everyone needs to work around or within your timelines, or else you have no time for them! You love order, but relationships require flexibility and relaxing the boundaries from time to time. While you might decide that you absolutely must get married by 27 and have your first child by 30, life doesn’t always work that way, and forcing people to abide by your strict rules could have you missing out on some pretty awesome stuff.
Air (Gemini, Libra, Aquarius): Running Hot & Cold
Like the summer breeze, Air signs can run both hot and cold when it comes to relationships, and – while some might find that changeable quality to be refreshing – when it concerns matters of the heart, it can leave you confused as to where you stand.
Air signs like Gemini, Libra, and Aquarius can have you thinking you’re in one situation before pulling the rug out from under you, leaving you wondering what exactly went wrong. Being kept on your toes and told to expect the unexpected is fine if you’re reading a book or watching a TV show, but most people prefer a little stability when it comes to their own lives, especially in relationships!
The thing is, Air signs just don’t really consider love to be this deep, heavy thing full of complex emotions and ideas, and so they don’t usually treat it with the seriousness it may deserve.
Love for them is playful and fun and, once it stops being that way, they usually want out. An Air sign can promise you the world one moment and stop replying to your texts the next, so watch out, because the red flags for these signs don’t appear until you’re already in deep.
Gemini: Biggest Flirt Award
Due to the social and outgoing personality that comes so naturally to most Gemini girls, you tend to have a pretty large circle of friends. Everywhere you go, you meet people you get along with, who totally vibe with your easygoing attitude and playful personality. Unfortunately, what makes you loveable can also get you into trouble – and even read as a red flag to those who want to date you. Sometimes having too many friends might alert a potential partner that you’re more ‘friendly’ than is desirable in a committed relationship.
Gemini girls have a reputation for being flirty, which is why they get along so well with so many people, but it can also seem like you aren’t that committed to the one you’re with. Since you bestow the same attention on everyone else you meet, it can seem like you don’t care that much about the person with whom you’re involved. Even though you rarely mean to flirt outright, your talkativeness, love of communication, and relaxed attitude send people totally different signals. It’s not your fault, but it doesn’t exactly put your partners at ease! Dudes who are a little more traditional in their relationships might not appreciate a woman as flirty as you, which is why this quality can raise a few red flags.
Libra: Indecisive And Flaky
Libra girl, you spend a lot of your time trying to make everyone around you happy. As the sign of the scales, you need to keep everything in perfect balance and harmony in order to feel at ease with your surroundings. Too bad for you that life doesn’t work that way!
Rather than actually work through a conflict, you end up running.
Your flaky behavior means that no one – romantic or otherwise – can rely on you for very long.
You tend to change your attitudes and opinions based on the people around you as a short-term conflict resolution, but it almost always comes back to bite you in the butt. Instead, to avoid the hassle altogether, you just ditch!
If a guy is looking to get involved with you, he has to know that you have a tendency to tuck tail and run, even if the situation isn’t dire. Making plans with you is difficult because you change your mind so often and something you like one day might not be the same the next! While a little spontaneity is nice in a girl, you’ve crossed the line to become a total flake, bailer, and ditcher, and having those qualities speak the loudest for you is doing everyone a disservice.
Aquarius: Totally Meh & Over It
The Aquarius girl is someone who marches to the beat of her own drum. You revel in your independence and are never faced with a challenge you can’t overcome – except when relationships are involved. Aquarius girl, while you love seeking out the next big adventure and discovering all the great things that the world has to offer, your limited attention span has you getting bored with your surroundings pretty quickly – not exactly ideal when your partner is looking for something long-term.
When you get bored or fed up in a relationship, you mentally and emotionally check out. Your emotions are like an on-off switch and, once someone has done something to turn you off, it’s very difficult for you to turn that passion back on. You never signed up for a passionless life, let alone love, and so once you’re feeling a little disinterested, you’ll get out while the getting’s good. Once passion is gone, it takes a lot to get it back and, frankly, you’re just not interested in putting in the effort! Usually, you’ll need someone else to divert your attention before making a break completely, but this mercurial affection is definitely a red flag for anyone who wants to get close to you.
Water (Cancer, Scorpio, Pisces): Two Halves Make A Codependent (W)hole
Water signs are known for being changeable: sometimes, they’re as calm as a serene lake, and other times as volatile as a sea in a storm. The passions felt by all three water signs can make for a dramatic and romantic relationship, the kind that gives credence to novels and grand gestures, but on the other side of the coin, we have anger, vitriol, and fights that end with everyone hurting.
The addictive behaviors of Water signs seem to be the undercurrent of their actions. They view love as the be-all and end-all of life, the purpose of life itself, and they will keep returning to toxic people and relationships for the momentary happiness it gives them.
Codependency is never a good thing, and it is a huge red flag in relationships with Water signs.
These signs have a penchant for nostalgia and can’t help but live in the past, which is what has them returning to the same person over and over again. Looking for a solution to their problems in an individual spells disaster, and yet, to the women born under any of the Water signs, it seems like the natural progression of love. While Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces can operate independently, they can sink into isolation without the help of another, which can, in turn, make them desperate, moody, and needy.
Cancer: Your Highs Are High & Your Lows Are Really Low
Anyone who has ever met a Cancer or known someone who has met a Cancer knows that women born under this sign are some of the moodiest people they will ever meet. The sensitivity that makes these ladies such good listeners and artists also means that they have mood swings that rival Kanye West’s Twitter feed.
With you, Cancer girl, people don’t always know where they stand. One moment, everything is unicorns and rainbows, and the next, it’s emo music and shutting yourself into your room. The smallest things can set you off, and your tendency towards giving your SO the silent treatment means that communication can be a no-go when you’re in the middle of a moody funk. As far as relationships go, this can make it impossible for someone to pursue something with you that’s drama-free since you seem to create drama wherever you go – it’s much more cinematic that way, right? Taking things personally and looking for reasons to get hurt make you pretty high-maintenance as a GF, so we can’t blame the guys who decide that you’re just not worth the trouble. Instead of thinking everything is about you in your miserable little world, how about taking a break from the navel-gazing and actually talking about what’s bothering you?
Scorpio: May Be The Master Of Manipulation
Scorpio woman, you are an expert when it comes to manipulation. In fact, you might even brag about your ability to work people over without totally realizing the negative connotations associated with it, since it’s always worked out in your best interests!
Unfortunately, “manipulative behavior” isn’t something you’ll usually see at the top of every guy’s must-have list of what he’s looking for in a partner, and your tendency to play mind games can raise a major red flag.
You see, Scorpio girl, you’re naturally inclined to distrust people – partly because you’ve been the guilty and distrustful party in the first place! You know everyone’s tricks, and it makes you a master at figuring out what makes them tick – and how to use it to your advantage. Potential partners, however, don’t want to be thought of as a user manual or something with cheat codes, and so your ability to manipulate them to get what you want isn’t an attractive quality – it’s something best avoided.
Keeping yourself at arm’s length while figuring out everyone else is a way to mask your insecurities and vulnerabilities, which is the stuff that actually makes you truly lovable! And the more lovable you are, the more irresistible you are, too.
Pisces: To Need & Be Needed
Sensitive and compassionate, a Pisces girl like you is one of the best friends anyone could ever have. You have the ability to empathize with another person’s struggles but, in doing so, you also feel like you require validation from other people in everything you do – and this couldn’t be truer than when it comes to relationships.
When it comes to love, you don’t just want to be with the person, you NEED it, and you need them to need you. Anything less doesn’t satisfy your romantic inclinations and a head full of daydreams. You’ve spent so much of your time fantasizing about the perfect love and the perfect partner that if your relationship doesn’t fulfill those requirements, you’re left wondering what went wrong. Since you tend to give your all to the person you’re dating, you expect the same in return. Then, when you – more likely than not – don’t get it, you become needy and emotionally dependent. Your insecurities are heightened and you need to be reminded of how things really are because your imagination will have you picturing the worst – not exactly an ideal quality when someone is trying to get closer to you.
by Annie F